The Transformers franchise is not a narrative based in reality. I’ll buy that aliens came to earth looking for a shiny rock they lost. I’ll buy that little itty bitty cars can suddenly morph into enormous walking, talking robots with way more moving parts than would fit in a standard Chevy. I’ll even suspend my imagination long enough to buy that Shia LaBeouf would have a turkey’s chance on Thanksgiving with Megan Fox. Where they cross the line in terms of believability is when they suppose that some of these cars could transform into good guys. This is a complete impossibility. All cars are inherently and undeniably evil. Frozen in the lake of burning ice next to Satan the Dragon cast down from heaven by the hand of God himself will be a Subaru Outback.
Our Subaru Outback…
May it burn forever…
After we don’t need it anymore…
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